Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
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