We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
well you can't waste a boner
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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