then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Semen is not good for contacts.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
