So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
