I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
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