i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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