Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Randomize
