my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
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