SEEEEXXX PLEASE
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
