a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
That accounts for only three of the penises
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
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