The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
My breasts were aching with rage.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Randomize
