I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
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