I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
