fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
I had to cum in my sink.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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