Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
