Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
