I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
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