I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
