I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize