Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
