Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
