Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
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I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
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I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize