His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
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