Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Randomize
