Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
3 2 1 whiskey
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
