my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
