is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
