I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
