I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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