I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
