if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Randomize
