Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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