Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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