This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
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