i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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