we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
