Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
