Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
