Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
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