Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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