Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
