what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Randomize
