What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Randomize
