shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
I am midnight drunk by noon
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
