Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
there's paper in my vomit.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Randomize
