is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Randomize
