just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I said "one day" and that day is not today
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
