Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
