I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
