you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
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nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
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Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
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