i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Randomize
