I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
